She's Come for a Visit

Originally Posted July 2012

Today Christian’s 9 year old biological sister flew in from Florida for a visit.  She will be here for ten days visiting Christian and her other little brother, Asher.

We’re thrilled she’s here…and also a little overwhelmed.  This is our first visit with any of Christian’s birth family since they are in Florida and we are twenty plus hours from there.  Also, we have some interesting dynamics in place since Christian was 18 months old when he left his birth family and joined our family.  There are memories there for him.  Not the conscious kind any longer, but definitely memories.

Already we’ve seen him try some behaviors he used a year ago to get his way.  Behaviors we worked long and hard to see leave.  He hasn’t quite figured out how to handle her being here.  He knows her from pictures, but this ‘in the flesh thing’ is different.  He’s testing his boundaries with us and her.  It is nerve-wracking to lay our family so completely open knowing that we do things SO VERY differently than her family does them.  We look different, eat different, discipline different, and live different and she will see just about every detail of our family in the next week since she’s living with us.

But it is SO worth it.  Already she has regaled us with stories of Christian’s life before our family.  What he liked and didn’t like.  Stories like the time he was blasted by a wave at a year old. (Which explains why he freaked out in the water the first 50 times we went swimming.)  She brought a stuffed animal that was his when he lived with them.  He latched right on and carried it around all night.  She’s giving us a glimpse into where Christian came from that we simply didn’t have before.  It is invaluable and precious and meaningful.

Right now he certainly doesn’t understand the dynamics of who she is and how she is related compared to his forever family.  He’s open and accepting because we are.  Some day, the fact that he gets to stay in contact with his big sister will be important to him.

So, however awkward this feels.  And whatever the enemy tries to say to us about what she may report to his birth mom regarding our home and the way we are raising our son doesn’t matter.  We aren’t doing this for us.  We are opening our hearts wider to include a sweet little girl who is significant in Christian’s life and story.

And maybe, just maybe, she will see our love for Christian and her and carry that home in her heart along with all the fun experiences we will we have together this week!

At the Aiport: Nay, Isobel and Christian, Jessica, Angela

Nay reading Christian a bedtime story. He climbed in her lap and she said “Wow, he’s big!” That what happens when a little boy grows 6+ inches in a year.